I began this post over two years ago but was not able to finish it until now. At that time I was beginning the process….
Hey, my wonderful people! My desire is that you find this post encouraging. Over the past few years, I’ve felt this strong urgency and pull to do more and challenge myself even more. I have been feeling that there is more to life than where I am. I have been doing a lot of praying, meditating, and quieting my spirit to get clarity from God. Since I have moved back home, I have had a lot of time to think and observe my life over the past year. I never imagined that I would have ever come back home after being away for 7 years in college…then I went away for a year and now I’m back again. The first time I came back a few years ago, I worked and got active in my community.
I worked as a therapist and served outside of work trying to reconnect with my community. After a while, I was burnt out. I did not want to be bothered. I was exhausted and discouraged. I realized that my hometown was not a place of progression in general especially for African-Americans. What I have come to realize is that the challenge of in productivity and progression is still here…but even deeper I see that there is a lack of purpose in the lives of those in the community. I continue to see so many talented and creative minds, yet there is no direction and no guidance. When people who genuinely desire to see growth and inspire growth in others and themselves, there is a lack of support as well as some resistance. I’m not too phase by either. What does bother me is that there are too many people who speak the word service but their agenda is to feed their egos and insecurities. Negativity is too common.
Being here has allowed me to see to how much I evolved as a woman spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. I’ve learned that my weakest moments have produced strength. I am truly out of my comfort zone. It’s not easy or even popular at times to be different and have a mission of social change. I’ve learned how to stay authentic to who I am in the midst of unproductive, rigid traditions and belief systems that are not conducive to positive, healthy changes…in churches, schools, businesses, organizations, and government. I understand more clearly about nonconformity.
I do believe that it is time for me to branch out from where l am and move on and pursue my destiny even further. The tools that I have gained are invaluable. I am more strategic in my actions and choices. I don’t linger in unproductive, unhealthy relationships or environments. I make sure that I am clear in my communications and offer respect to every person that I encounter and I expect the same in return. I make sure that I support causes that concern me. I don’t overextended myself because I cannot be my best self if I am depleted. It is okay to say no. I am constantly feeding my spirit with inspiration. I take time breathe and laugh. Inhale. Exhale. Let it go. I forgive and seek forgiveness. Peace is necessary.
Most importantly, I have learned that in my moments discomfort and challenges is that it is intended to make me stronger and that there are lessons to be learned so that I am prepared for the next season in life.
Talk to you soon!